When I was thirteen I went to the doctors. He said, “Keith, you’re autistic.” I was like, “Sweet, I like to draw!” He was like, “No, you don’t understand…you have a social disorder called, “Aspergers Syndrome.” I was like, “What’s that?” He said, “It’s no big deal, you’re just going to have a hard time […]
[Continue reading] about Keith Reza host of Reza RiftsHibachi Standup
My grandfather like to go to Hibachi because the chef cooks in front of you. Whenever we go, he thinks it’s funny to place his order in a racist Japanese accent. Not only is it offensive, it’s always awkward to actually watch the chef spit in your food. @themikesicoli
[Continue reading] about Hibachi StandupWhat if I told you, you could retire early and all you have to do is work a few extra hours a week?
I’m almost 31. When you hit your thirties, all your friends either join some sort of self-improvement cult or go all in with the alcoholism. If its the former, you just hope they don’t join one of those MLM pyramid get rich schemes. Those things are always trying to sell you a cure to some […]
[Continue reading] about What if I told you, you could retire early and all you have to do is work a few extra hours a week?Pierogies
Accidental Catcalling
Being gay gets me in trouble with women sometimes. The other day, a woman walked past me and I said “Damn!” She made a face and realize she thought I was catcalling her. I just thought she had a bad ass pair of heels.
[Continue reading] about Accidental CatcallingGenius
At this point, he could just say he built the wall and they would believe him. @Sandragotjokes
[Continue reading] about GeniusIn that case, Larry King has more lives than a cat
When I told my dad I was getting married, he got all philosophical. He said, “Did you know most people die twice? Second time, you have pallbearer. First time, ring bearer.” I was like, “Dad you’re on your third marriage. By your own logic, you’ve come back to life more than Jesus.” Ben Rosenfeld’s Comedy […]
[Continue reading] about In that case, Larry King has more lives than a catDial it down
When I was 12, we had dial-up and my mom tried to the use the phone but she couldn’t because I was online. She checked on what I was doing and saw I was in a chat room talking to adult strangers. She shut my computer down and was like “You are NOT allowed to […]
[Continue reading] about Dial it downWhen you talk about sports…
I have a Level 85 dwarven paladin, an 82 shadow priest, and I’m currently leveling a warrior through Northrend, although I spend most of my time taking instances in the Dungeon Finder. I’ve held off getting Mists of Pandaria because I got burned out on endgame progression after Wrath of the Lich King and the […]
[Continue reading] about When you talk about sports…Mistaken Identity
Unrelated, he was very old.
Every year we get older and it takes longer to recover from New Year’s Eve. It took me a full 24 hours. Took my friend a whole 48 hours and my other friend died. antoniocomedy.com
[Continue reading] about Unrelated, he was very old.It’s always good to have options.
Basically I just want to lose enough weight that road head is an option again.
[Continue reading] about It’s always good to have options.The financial crisis
Scott Bolander and his Driving Experience
I was driving one time and heard something thumping. Upon stopping, I was horrified to find that someone had tied a nun to my rear bumper. She was quite dead. So I cut her loose and drove off – finally secure that I had forever left behind my drug habit.
[Continue reading] about Scott Bolander and his Driving ExperienceMy parents were just glad to find a babysitter
The only time I was held as a child was once, and it was for ransom. Alex Avery @AlexAveryisdead
[Continue reading] about My parents were just glad to find a babysitterBut it feels like 6 feet under…
People sure seem to dislike this president. But what if …? What if they hate him simply because they fail to recognize his genius? After all, you can’t have global warming if the globe is engulfed in a nuclear winter. Paul Jensen
[Continue reading] about But it feels like 6 feet under…