Deprecated: wp_make_content_images_responsive is deprecated since version 5.5.0! Use wp_filter_content_tags() instead. in /var/www/standup/wp-includes/functions.php on line 4773
Once I had sex with my girlfriend in an IKEA parking lot, and then immediately spent $800 on furniture for her apartment. She asked if it felt like I paid for sex. I said “Kinda. Except instead of leaving your money on the nightstand, I BOUGHT you the nightstand.”